Scottish Funeral Etiquette
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Scottish Funeral Etiquette, Traditions, Rituals, and Attire

From the soulful strains of the bagpipe to the intricate proceedings, the rich cultural heritage of Scottish funeral etiquette is rich with symbolism. The attire, often traditional kilts and tartan patterns, further enhances the impact.

Scottish funerals are more than ceremonies; they’re an embodiment of vibrant culture, resilient spirit, and enduring regard for the passed. 

In this article we explore many of the key elements of a Scottish funeral, including 

  • History and traditions
  • Greetings and attire 
  • The funeral service 
  • Funeral processions

Join us as we share the history and details of what makes Scottish funerals so unique and moving.

Funeral Traditions in Scottish Culture

Scotland is a country with diverse local customs, particularly when it comes to marking the end of life. The rugged and sometimes isolated landscapes have evolved through the centuries distinctive Scottish funeral traditions that differ from community to community.

These days you’ll see dark clothing, the universal sign of grief, offering condolences to express sympathy and emotional support. And observing moments of silence as a form of communal mourning. 

In some communities, especially close-knit ones, it’s traditional to visit the family at home before the funeral, bringing food and drink. People stand by one another during times of loss, forging stronger bonds through shared grief.

Historical Roots of Scottish Funeral Customs

As a land known for its rich folklore and cultural heritage, Scotland has a fascinating history of funeral etiquette and customs. These practices, deeply rooted in the nation’s pagan past, reflect the age-old Scottish attitude towards death. 

  • The Celts, the ancestral people of the Scots, believed in an afterlife and had their own way of acknowledging death. They were known for their practice of divination and foretelling of impending death. Various signs, such as the appearance of certain animals were interpreted as omens of an upcoming demise. This belief in forewarning showed their acceptance of death, rather than fear of it.
  • The pagan Scots held also a heroic view of death, especially in the context of battle. Warriors were celebrated as heroes, their deaths seen as a passage into immortality. The glory of battle was highly revered, with the Scottish saying that when someone dies in battle they will be welcomed into the Otherworld, a realm of the gods and the dead. 
  • The ancient Scots, has a distinct approach when laying the dead to rest. One such practice was washing and wrapping bodies in a traditional burial cloth.
  • In older traditions in the Highlands, a wooden plate was placed on the deceased’s chest when they were laid out. On the plate was a handful of earth and salt. The salt represented the eternal soul and the earth symbolised the body’s burial and return to the earth.
  • In contrast, Galloway mourners would keep the door ajar, allowing the spirit to leave the body. Copper coins were placed upon the eyes and all mirrors were covered and clocks stopped. 

Wakes or “Fèillirean”

The practice known as a wake or “Fèillirean” offers an interesting perspective on death in Scotland. During a Scottish wake, family, friends, and community members come together to share memories and recount stories.

Many of these traditions have a specific cultural or spiritual significance, similar to an Irish wake.

In the past, Gairloch mourners would all stop working until the funeral, further emphasizing that community spirit. They would open doors and windows as a way to allow the spirit to depart freely.

Another important tradition is the constant vigil kept over the remains, to protect the body from evil spirits. Known as “wake watching”, the practice involved guarding the body 24 hours a day for a week.

Despite the sorrowful undertones, Scottish wakes are not entirely somber affairs. At the conclusion of the wake, a celebratory atmosphere often takes over. This celebration can include music, dance, food, and drink (whiskey!) reflecting the Scottish belief in celebrating life, even in the face of death.

Dress Code and Attire 

The Scottish funeral dress code isn’t just convention, but a reflection of centuries-old customs and regional variations. Men don a traditional kilt in the family tartan, a striking symbol of familial pride and belonging. 

For women, it’s not uncommon to see them in traditional dress, complete with tartan sashes or shawls. The funeral protocol varies from region to region, but the essence remains the same.

Traditional Scottish Funeral Attire & its Significance

For the traditional funeral clothing in Scotland, kilts made from tartan fabric accompanied by the sporran pouch are a significant part of Scottish heritage.

Originally, Highlanders wore them as basic clothing. Now, they’re a symbol of respect at funerals. 

Adhering to funeral etiquette, traditional Scottish attire isn’t just clothing…

…it’s a tapestry of history and identity weaving together to honor a person’s life in the most profound way possible.

The Scottish saying when someone dies, “We’re all Jock Tamson’s bairns,” reminds us of our common humanity and mortality. It underscores that the attire of Scottish funerals isn’t just about clothes but symbols of unity. 

Proper Attire for Attendees (Both Men and Women)

The proper attire for attending a Scottish funeral typically involves formal wear.

  • Male Attire:
    • A dark suit isn’t the only option for men.
    • The majestic kilt is a highly respected form of attire.
    • Paired with a black jacket, tie, and white shirt, it’s a powerful blend of style and solemnity. 
  • Female Attire:
    • A modest dress in darker tones is the go-to choice.
    • Hats are optional but can be a meaningful addition.
    • Nothing too flashy or extravagant, but stylish and appropriate.
  • Gender Neutral Attire:
    • Dark, conservative clothing. This could be a dark suit, a tailored blazer with trousers, or a modest dress or skirt at knee length or longer.
    • Smart formal shoes that are clean and polished.
    • Keep accessories simple and minimal.
  • Accessorizing with intention is also key. Think tartan ties or scarves, brooches with Scottish emblems.

But remember, balance is essential — it’s all about paying homage to the traditions while acknowledging the solemnity of the occasion.

Wearing Tartans and Clan Colors as a Mark of Respect

Every tartan design and color represented a specific Scottish clan or family. Each one carries its own fascinating tale of bravery and kinship. 

The ritual of wearing Scottish tartans and clan colors is so much more than just a visual spectacle.

It’s an emotional homage, a mark of profound respect for the deceased. By wearing these ancestral colors, attendees are not just mourning a loss; they’re celebrating a life lived within the folds of clan fellowship. 

Arrival and Greetings

The funeral visitation etiquette sets the tone for the rest of the ceremony. It’s a touching moment that underscores the importance of togetherness in times of loss. 

The atmosphere is one of courtesy and sensitivity. There’s a beautiful harmony in the way everyone rallies around the grieving family, offering shoulders to lean on, a listening ear, and words of comfort.

Timeliness and Punctuality

The importance of timeliness and punctuality at a Scottish funeral can’t be overstated. It’s a cornerstone of reverence, a vital part of the cultural fabric. Arriving on time, or even a touch before, for the funeral service is an unwritten rule, a silent agreement among all attendees.

Appropriate Greetings and Expressions of Condolences

It’s not just about saying the right things, but about meaning them, too. Many people use condolence greetings like “I’m deeply sorry for your loss” or “My thoughts are with you and your family”.

They might seem overused or inconsequential but they’re surprisingly heartfelt and lets them know that they’re not alone in their grief. 

Non-verbal gestures are equally important. A comforting touch on the shoulder, a gentle nod, or the gift of funeral flowers are all part of the Scottish custom. They silently communicate empathy and respect.

Offering Support and Gestures to the Bereaved

During moments of loss, knowing how to help the bereaved doesn’t always come easy. But, in the midst of sorrow, it’s amazing how the smallest gestures of kindness can make a difference.

Sending condolences with a card or flowers, lending a hand with the details, and simply being there to listen can be immensely reassuring. It’s all about showing empathy and truly hearing their stories and feelings. 

Order of the Funeral Service and Participation

To unite funeral participants in their shared grief, hymns and prayers, particularly the traditional ‘Auld Lang Syne,’ is a common feature of orders of service. Each element contributes to creating a space where love, loss, and remembrance intermingle.

Observing the Order of Service

The order of service for a funeral typically begins with:

  • The arrival of the funeral cortege and is followed by family members and friends.
  • The minister or celebrant then starts the service with a welcome note and prayer. 
  • Followed by a eulogy, hymns, readings, moments of reflection, and even a bagpipe lament. The service concludes with committal and final blessings.

Your presence alone provides support. Simply follow the lead of others in attendance and participate as you feel comfortable. Show reverence by dressing appropriately, listening attentively during the service, and offering words of condolence to the family afterward.

Appropriate Behavior and Respect During Religious or Cultural Rituals

Understanding funeral nuances is crucial for appropriate demeanor. Depending on the family, they can be deep-rooted cultural rituals.

In terms of etiquette for Scottish funerals, it’s considered polite to accept the invitation and participate in the communal grieving. As always, silence is maintained during the service as a sign of respect. And if there’s a condolence book, take the time to sign it; it will be appreciated. 

Active Participation in Hymns and Prayers

  • To be involved in the entire funeral service isn’t just about being physically present, but about being emotionally present as well.
  • This may include singing in the hymns, respecting the prayers, and the Scottish funeral poems.
  • One of the most iconic elements in a Scottish funeral is singing “Auld Lang Syne.” It symbolizes the end of one journey and the beginning of another.
  • A poignant reminder of friendship, shared memories, and the irrevocable march of time.

Active participation in hymns includes standing when this song is sung as a mark of appreciation.

Funeral Procession and Graveside Customs

The length of a funeral procession often depends on the distance between the church or funeral home and the cemetery.

  • In Scotland, it’s common for mourners to follow the hearse on foot or in cars, creating a solemn parade through the streets.
  • Although funeral procession rules aren’t set in stone, at the gravesite, customs include a brief ceremony led by a minister or another person of faith
  • There may be readings, prayers, and bagpipe music.
  • It’s customary for everyone to toss a handful of soil onto the coffin as it’s lowered into the ground.

Other traditions include pouring whisky into the grave.

Photography and Technology

Photography captures the solemnity of the occasion, the heartfelt emotions, and the poignant Scottish funeral quotes, immortalizing them in a digital canvas.

  • It’s essential to respect the family’s wishes at a funeral. So, before capturing these moments, ask for permission as a courtesy. 
  • During such sensitive times, the use of mobile devices should be minimal and discreet.
  • The funeral ceremony is a private space of mourning; it’s not a spectacle for public consumption or social media feeds. For the family’s privacy, follow discretion and ask for permission when sharing.

It’s undeniable that technology has even changed how to attend a funeral. Advances in technology make it possible for mourners to participate in funerals from afar, providing solace to those who cannot attend in person.

Conclusion

In the heart of the Scottish lowlands or in the craggy highlands, you’ll find a unique blend of tradition and etiquette when it comes to funeral ceremonies. 

The Scottish funeral etiquette often requires more than just showing up — it’s about getting involved in a centuries-old culture of honoring life and expressing condolences. 

As you prepare to attend such a ceremony, remember that your role extends beyond being a mere spectator. You’re there to uphold the traditions, acknowledge the wishes of the bereaved families, and pay tribute to a life well-lived.

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